wat.

uhhh....I'm 16 and I'm from Iowa and I'm very boring and I like a lot of things. If you need advice or someone to talk to go for it.
veganbutt:

Due to an unfortunate reviewing accident, Amazon now calls me “shredded wheat”

veganbutt:

Due to an unfortunate reviewing accident, Amazon now calls me “shredded wheat”

(via sloth-grunge)

thoscheiongallifrey:

the kid in the first Captain America movie who was thrown into the water and said to Steve: 
"Go get him. I can swim" 
will always will be one of my favourite things in history of cinema. 

(via pleasejustcallmejoe)

drunktrophywife:

dennys:

"It’s a metaphor, see. You put the bacon thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the…um…well, you eat it, actually, ‘cause it’s there and you’re nearly tasting it. So it’s not a metaphor. Um. I have no idea where I was going with that. Want some bacon?"

I’m deleting

(via poopflow)

galaxynextdoor:

Have You Hugged Your Controller Today?

You can and you should. No, not your hard plastic controllers which give only cold hard love, you need one of these cushiony controller pillows from the cool folks at Felt Sew Good. You can even request your own custom cushion to be made. Finally, I can have an Atari joypad that actually gives joy.

(via pleasejustcallmejoe)

timeywimeyhobbit:

tfios-changed-my-life:

"Augustus is soooo pretentious!!!"

Ohmygod, no way?? It’s almost as if that’s exactly what John Green intended.

"Augustus Waters talked so much that he’d interrupt you at his own funeral. And he was pretentious: Sweet Jesus Christ, that kid never took a piss without pondering the abundant metaphorical resonances of human waste production."

(via heavenlydoctor)

trillow:

[police officer] “sir are you in possession of any illegal drugs”

“sure thing son whatchu need”

(via heavenlydoctor)

clown-dick:

for someone who pretends to have no emotions whatsoever im really sensitive

(via spoopiness)

fartgallery:

kids that look exactly like one of their parents are so weird, it’s like they’re the lowercase and uppercase versions of a person

(via you-got-to-kill-your-mind)